Thursday, September 27, 2012

Emily W Memoir: Confetti

9 comments:

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  3. I really enjoyed listening to your memoir. I agree with Taylor about the fact that you stumble over words and repeat or just pause after them before continuing on. I loved how many pictures you had and the way you personalized the whole memoir with personal, unique stories. Nicely done!

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  4. This is awesome! Your voice inflection was good - I could really hear the personality and emotion behind the words. I loved the pictures, but even if you didn't have them, I would still be able to tell what the scene was like because your descriptions were so great. The introductions at the beginning of each piece and the So What? at the end was a nice touch. Good job!

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  5. Hello. You did good with the transitions and the beginning and end. Your voice inflection was okay. You needed to practice a bit more. And perhaps figure out how to shorten a bit. Gosh... you got a 3.33 repeating. NOT GOOD. Do better.

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  6. Emily! Good job on your memoir! I loved a lot of the vocabulary you used and how you provided back up on your stories so I knew what you were talking about. I loved the Christmas memoir and wish I could see it all in person! (cough cough Christmas nerd cough (; )
    I think something you could fix would be your fluency because your stories were somewhat choppy when put together. Also I'm not sure if your timing was slow or it was just loading. If it was timing then I recommend fixing that next time. Other than that I found this very entertaining to watch! Good job English buddy!

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  7. I loved it Emily! You had excellent speed, description, background information and seemed confident. Maybe you could shorten some parts, as the time limit was 5 minutes but maybe you needed more time. I loved the little intro before each memoir. Great job! Maybe you could tell us more why it was called confetti, from your view, so the viewers are clear of your message. Once again, you did an amazing, outstanding job.

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  8. Emily I love your memoir's. You had really great pictures, and I can really hear your personal voice in every memoir. I wish that at times you could put just a tiny bit more of background information in it. Like Lauren said your introductions were great, and I would really like to know more on why you chose your theme. I felt that at time you struggled on words, but overall it was super great.

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  9. I think some of your memoirs are really short and could stand to be a little longer so as to add a little bit more detail to them. Also your transitions between different memoirs sometimes seams a little awkward. I do love how you describe some of the settings so indept and some of the metaphors you use really make your meaning pop.

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